Thursday, May 28, 2015

Letting Go

I have found that I have a very hard time letting things go.  Whether it is a good thing or a bad thing I have a tendency to pine over it and not let it go.  No matter how hard I try I can't let it go.  The only way for me to totally let something go is to put it out of sight and mind.  I have to remove myself from the situation or distance myself from the person in order to let whatever happened go.  It is really hard for me for some reason. 

I know that I wear my heart on my sleeve and that I am too sensitive about things sometimes.  I even know that I internalize almost everything, that I project outcomes before they happen.  Sometimes I am right and sometimes I am wrong when I do that.  Coleen balances me out very well because she is forever the optimist and I take a more pessimistic outlook.  I take that outlook I think because I don't want to be disappointed by people if they don't live into what I expect from them. 

For the past year I have been dealing with something that I knew had a shelf life.  I knew it was coming to an end at a given point.  Even though something has been different about it all year and it hasn't felt the same I held on and wouldn't let it go.  I tried to make the best of it and take an optimistic approach.  Unfortunately it hasn't really helped and I found myself more times than not praying about it or asking for guidance from God. 

One thing that I really enjoy about working at the church is that everyday I can go and sit in the sanctuary and talk to God.  I can work through issues and problems while sitting in a pew.  God listens to me, I can feel that.  I know that he is there and watching over me.  I feel better after I talk with him.

I am not sure what is going to happen with my current situation.  Will I have to remove myself in order to let go?  Will I be able to work through it?  I am not sure which way it will go.  All I do know is that God will be with me through whatever I have to do. 

You need to realize that God is with you all the time as well.  You might have an easy decision to make or a hard one, it doesn't matter because God is with you.  Whether you have to let something go, confront someone about something, deal with an issue at work or school, or just want guidance in making a life decision, remember that God is always there for you and he is listening.  Make sure you talk to him.  I know that I sure do! 

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